Dear Reader, here we are. It’s October, yet it seems only five minutes away from Bye-bye July. Since then, though I have not been reunited with my mojo, we have – at least – high-fived in passing. August was a headfuck. When I wrote Headfuckers: a Precautionary Tale, I left out the auto-headfuck. That should be in there, too – just saying. August was also when I finally learned to read the small print on the ‘I’ll Take Care of You’ promise card. Never too old, right? September, back and forth, here and there, so rapidly, I gave myself whiplash, RSI and who-knows-what-else. Through all this, tenacious friends and family kept me as sane as I’ll ever be – for which I’ll never be able to thank them enough (but I’ll try).
Well, as I said, here we are…
This morning, my first thought was the old joke:
Q: How do you make God laugh?
A: Tell him your plans for the future.
So, dear Reader, here are my plans for October:
- Spend more than one week in the same bed.
- Spend more than two weeks in the same country.
- Spend more than two weeks without booking a flight.
- Get paid employment.
- Be reunited with my winter clothes.
- Sleep eight hours a night.
- Specifically, October 10: eat Persepolis ice-cream and socca. Get covered in dog hair.
*Sits back and waits for celestial mirth*