Categories
Thinking

Blue Monday

07:59:57 Monday 18 January 2021.

Taken on my morning walk along the River Colne, facing east towards the newly-risen Sun. A reflective time before hosting Zoom lectures.

Categories
Thinking

Late Fragment

And did you get what
you wanted from this life, even so?
I did.
And what did you want?
To call myself beloved, to feel myself
beloved on the earth.

Raymond Carver, A New Path to the Waterfall, Atlantic Monthly Press, 1989.

Categories
Thinking

Blue Moon Rising

The Hallowe’en full moon rising over Bury St Edmunds, Suffolk.
Categories
Thinking

Change

‘It is easier to endure than to change. But once one has changed, what was endured is hard to recall.’

Susan Sontag, The Benefactor (1963)

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Thinking

Shared Laughter

‘One can never speak enough of the virtues,

the dangers, the power of shared laughter’

Francoise Sagan (1935 – 2004).

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Thinking

Mud Stories

Low tide on the River Colne lets the mud tell its stories.

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Thinking

The End

I am too much

For you

You are not enough

For me.

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Thinking

Deep Stillness

There’s a deep stillness 

In me 

My own wine 

Dark sea 

A calm storm

My Odyssey.

Categories
Thinking

The First Ten Days.

Of the 366 in 2020. A leap year.

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Looking back, over the views which bridged the reflective new year holiday in Cornwall, before looking forward to what is yet to come.

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Returning to Essex, meant returning to work – two different employers, two different jobs, on three different sites in two different towns.

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I was met by new faces, old faces, all: ‘Happy 2020!’

I step (rather than leap) into a new job in the third week of this month.

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I’m apprehensive and curious; it’s energising. Step forward, 2020.

Categories
Thinking

Mirage

/ˈmɪrɑːʒ,mɪˈrɑːʒ/

Noun: mirage

1. An optical illusion caused by atmospheric conditions

2. An unrealistic hope or wish that cannot be achieved

Origin – early 19th century: from French se mirer ‘be reflected’, from Latin mirare ‘look at’.

(With thanks to the Oxford English Dictionary).

Lately, although I have felt that much appears unreal and that my life is being lived in suspension as I watch my reflection in a waiting game, I know that this time will pass. It will do so quickly enough, to make way for September with her new beginnings and a change of uniform. And I do believe that this year’s colours are going to suit me.

Colchester Town Hall as seen from the garden at The Green Room, North Hill, in the heat haze of late August